Lunchboxes, Little Tummies, and a Healthy Relationship with Food
Written by Katie Whelan, mom and nutrition coach at Macro Mama of 5
Supporting our kids at lunchtime
Recently, I helped in the classroom as a sub. During lunch, as the kids opened their lunchboxes, I heard a few familiar phrases:
“Can I have my treat now?”
“I don’t want my chicken, I just want my cookie.”
And from one little voice: “That food is bad. It has sugar.”
If you’ve ever packed a lunchbox, you know the struggle: you are quickly throwing something together before you run out the door, you forget the cute note, and let's not even talk about the flower-shaped cheese or seasonal-shaped sandwich that we see on IG and Pinterest… not going to happen. I’m lucky if my kids end up with much more than a sandwich and some Goldfish.
As a sub at the school, a mom of 5, and a nutrition coach, I want to share a few simple ideas to make lunch easier, kinder, and more nourishing for everyone.
The goals for lunchtime at this age are simple:
Help kids get enough fuel to learn, play, and grow.
Help them build a positive, relaxed relationship with food.
Food is just food; it holds no moral value.
Preschoolers are little sponges. They repeat what they hear at home, from older siblings, from TV, and from us.
“Sugar is bad,” and other messages kids hear carry over to the learning environment.
When a child says, “That food is bad,” what they’re really telling us is:
“I’ve picked up the idea that food has moral value—good/bad, right/wrong.”
But food isn’t a moral issue. It’s just food. Some foods help our bodies grow and stay strong. Some give us quick energy. Some are just for fun and for enjoyment. All of those can have a place.
Instead of:
“Cookies are bad for you.”
Try: “Cookies are fun foods. We also want to make sure we eat some foods that help our bodies grow strong.”
Instead of:
“You can’t have that, it has too much sugar.”
Try: “Let’s make sure we eat some of our growing foods first, then we can enjoy the fun ones too.”
Kids this age do not need food guilt. They need language that teaches balance.
A simple way to think about packing lunch
You do not have to make Pinterest-perfect bento boxes unless you love that kind of thing. Then, please, by all means, create away!
Think: simple, balanced, and nut-free.
A helpful formula is:
1 protein + 1 fruit/veg + 1 grain/starch + 1 fun food
Examples that work well for The Learning Nest:
Proteins (no nuts):
Sliced turkey, chicken, or ham
Cheese sticks or cheese cubes
Yogurt or yogurt tubes
Hummus (if allowed) with crackers or veggies
Hard-boiled egg
Beans or chickpeas (in a small container or mixed into pasta/salad)
Fruits & Veggies:
Berries, apple slices, clementines, grapes (cut appropriately)
Cucumber slices, baby carrots, snap peas, bell pepper strips
Steamed veggies that are good cold: green beans, broccoli, peas
Grains/Starches:
Crackers
Pita bread or tortilla wedges
Pasta or noodle salad
Rice, couscous, or mini muffins
Whole-grain/wheat bread or rolls
Fun Foods (“treats”):
A small cookie
A few chocolate chips
Fruit snacks
A small piece of candy
A mini brownie bite or a small portion of chips
You don’t have to label these as “junk” or “bad.” They’re just the fun part of the meal.
Making lunch less of a battle.
That day in the classroom, the kids and I turned eating into a game.
They loved doing things like:
“One bite of cracker, one bite of chicken.”
“One chocolate chip, one carrot.”
They were proud when they took a bite of something they didn’t love as much. It felt like a challenge, not a chore. They were high-fiving me, and there were tons of tiny voices all trying to get my attention to show me how many bites they had eaten.
A few ideas you can use at home:
“Food pattern” game:
“Let’s do a pattern: crunch (carrot), munch (sandwich), sweet (cookie crumb)!”
Tiny portions of the ‘hard stuff’:
Sometimes kids are overwhelmed by a big pile of veggies or meat. Smaller portions feel more doable. They can always ask for more.
Let them choose the order:
Some kids want their fun food first, some want it last. Often, if we stay relaxed, they naturally nibble their way through the rest of the lunch.
Remember: the goal isn’t an empty plate or lunchbox. It’s a child who feels safe with food and gets enough to fuel their body.
How we talk about food matters
Here are some quick swaps that support a healthier mindset:
Instead of:
“You have to finish your healthy food before you get your treat.”
Try:
“Let’s make sure your body gets some energy and strong food, then we’ll have the fun food too.”
Instead of:
“You’re being picky.”
Try:
“It’s okay not to love everything. Let’s try one small bite and see what we think today.”
Instead of:
“You never eat your veggies.”
Try:
“You took two bites of your carrots today—that helps your body stay strong.”
We want kids to feel proud of trying, not ashamed of struggling.
What we should be aiming for:
Food-neutrality: we avoid calling foods “good” or “bad.”
Balance-focused: we encourage “a little bit of everything” when possible.
Child-centered: We respect appetites. Some days, kids are hungrier than others, and that’s normal.
When you pack your child’s lunch, you are not just sending food; you are sending messages about how they should feel around food.
I hope that we can all send a message to our kids that says:
“Food helps your body, food can be fun, and you never have to feel guilty for eating.”
That’s the kind of relationship with food that can last long after preschool.